Perfection is an Artificial Word by Afrah

Living your ideal life is living in a house with bullet-proof windows and blackout curtains: it’s living in survivalist mode. 

We have always been scared of change and terrified of obstacles. We look at the bullets we fired at the old flimsy film of glass that we decided was too unsafe. Yet we keep the broken glass in our cupboards to remind ourselves of the fractured past.

Why do we hang on to our past rather than looking ahead? 

Researchers at Dartmouth have analyzed this behavior and concluded that, “People talk one-and-half-times more about the past than the future.” 

People second guess themselves one too many times because of this past. I’m no exception. I’ve had different experiences where I looked at my faults, transformed them into holes . . . then fell in. 

“Wipe it off and try it again,” I kept telling my beginner self as I took the henna cone and dragged it across my eight-year old hand. 

“This is not exactly like the design in the photo. Smudge it off. It’s stained, but let’s try again.”

“What am I even doing wrong?” This phrase indented my mind. If only little me knew that practice makes perfect, and I just wasn’t practiced enough.

As I grew up, my henna improved because I finally stopped caring about being perfect. But it only became the best it could be when I approached it as an artful expression of my passion rather than a harsh judgement of my performance.

Madison Beer said in her memoir, “If a flower doesn’t grow, you don’t blame the flower—you inspect what might be hindering its ability to grow. Is it enough sunlight? Enough water? Is it bad soil?” 

Madison’s memoir is a culture shock to every fangirl as they perceive someone like her to be perfect. We all thought she arrived fully bloomed, but she reveals something different. An important life lesson. You’re not the problem, your environment is. 

So change it: drop your problematic friends, clean your for-you page, and just start doing your homework—so you can begin blooming. 

Put your finger down if you have embarrassed yourself on more than one occasion. Put another down if you have failed a class and cried for hours on end about it. What about if you have looked at someone else’s life and felt the slightest . . . maybe more . . . hint of jealousy? Seriously, no judgement here, I put all mine down. 

A 2024 survey reveals that about one in third Gen Z teenagers feel the need to be perfect. Feeling insecure is common, especially in a world that expects light from flickering lamps. And hitting rock bottom is eventual when you tell yourself that what is normal is abnormal. 

Life is meant to be lived imperfectly. 

Even though I haven’t figured this one out fully, through feeling these emotions, I am human. Evolution, through faith or science, both conclude that even though humans have created a deep hole for themselves, they advanced by using their minds to create ladders and elevators to escape. 

As it says in Frank Ocean’s Be Yourself, “Be yourself and know that that’s good enough.” 

Feel alive and indifferent, not alien and unfortunate.

Being perfect makes us happy. But what if being happy is what creates perfection? The 50-40-10 Happiness Model explains how happiness is made of three parts: 50% from genetics, 40% from our actions and state of mind, and 10% from our circumstances. So according to this, 60% of our happiness is already set in stone or is everchanging. The 40% is the determining factor, and funny enough, it’s the thing we can control. 

So look at the perfect moments in life, not the foggy, unclear memories you have of it. 

Personally, journaling has been a game changer in adapting my view of the world. From blabbing on and on about how boring school was or from reflecting on my mistakes, each time it feels like I’m changing my negative thoughts into positive responses. 

I know that looking at the glass half full is better than looking at it half empty. And even though there are days where it seems like there is barely enough water to survive, you have to realize that you are still alive . . . and living is better off breakable and moldable than shatterproof and unchanged.